Tag / 3-column study

by johnkking

What May Come

Small Group DBSs

During the last four days I spent time with 700+ university students at the Global Mission Experience. It was hosted by Harding University this year and was held at Camp Tahkodah and at HUT. Here is the link to a one-minute trailer that was prepared for it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tkpheRKlMB0&feature=youtu.be

It was great to introduce these young people to Discovery Bible Studies. On Friday they worked through Luke 10:1-20 in small groups of 4-5. On Saturday those who returned watched a skit that dramatized what an attempt to find a Person of Peace might look like in a resistant community. Then they did another small group DBS looking at Deuteronomy 6:1-10.

Pray that several of these students will start Discovery groups on their respective campuses. These students came from across the U.S. and it is exciting to think about what God may do through them.

by johnkking

Pass It On

Four days ago I exposed more than 30 people to Discovery Bible Studies. We spent most of our three-hour gathering learning how to do an Oral DBS. But I also spent a few minutes talking about doing a written discovery process that is called a 3-column study. I gave each person a copy of a format that I have developed. One of the class members emailed me to ask for a digital copy of the form, so she would not have to re-create it. After I sent one to her in pdf she wrote back, explaining how she hopes to use this:

I have a lovely, bright and gifted 5th-grader who is having trouble understanding how important it is to have self-control over his tongue. I have been praying for him for a week or so, and I woke up in the middle of the night the other night with the idea to give him the 3-column bible study on a series of proverbs that have helped me immensely to control my own tongue. I believe it will be fruitful for this newly saved and baptized young man. I’ll let you know what God does!

Here is my reply to this teacher:

Years ago I was attempting to catalyze DBSs in the local jail. I started working with the one person I knew who was incarcerated there. He began a group study, to pass on what he was learning. When we knew he was soon to be released I asked him to pick the best candidate to keep it going. I started meeting with that guy, too. Every time the leader was about to be released we repeated this process.

Eventually I noticed generational degradation (copy a copy of a copy long enough and the quality deteriorates). It reached its lowest when the only guy who was an option had damaged his mental capacity greatly by using illegal substances—especially smoking wild mushrooms. His attention span and impulse control were negligible. I really agonized with whether or not I was wasting my time. But my bare-bones requirement for meeting with him weekly was whether or not he would do a 3-column study. He kept attempting to write one out, so I kept working with him. Months later this guy was transferred to the state penitentiary two hours away. Writing letters was our only contact. His last letter shared what he had recently discovered (all on his own) about the work of the Holy Spirit in his life. He wrote out the verses he had discovered, how he understood them and how he was trying to live them. It blew me away! I believe the Spirit “re-wired” some of his neural pathways. The 3-column studies became a spiritual discipline that the Spirit used to help him recover from some of the abuse he had done to himself.

While this young man you are working with is not that extreme an example, I praise God this approach may be a blessing for him! I pray it will equip him to experience Romans 12:1-2 “Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

Two suggestions connected to this: keep the passages short (I suspect that you will already do that since you are going to use Proverbs) and do a 3-column study yourself, on the same passages. Show him your sheet when you read over his. Share with him how you are obeying–putting into practice—each passage. Model for him the process as well as teach him to do it and hold him accountable.

Blessings,
John King

Maybe you know a place where this process would be helpful. If so, just email me a request for the form (preacher at stonesriver.org) by replacing the spaces and “at” with the symbol. I will be happy to share this resource with you.

by johnkking

When Did We See You in Prison? (part 4)

Justin’s group sent me some 3-column studies.  Their insights into passages (the first time they have ever attempted to do this) continue to amaze me.  As is true of most, some prefer to speak of what “we” or “they” should do in the third column, but I continue to point out that this will be more beneficial if each point begins with the words, “I will…”  This process truly is about discovery, not preaching or teaching.

Recently Justin was moved out of the pod.  He was transferred to the state offices to assess his status on a parole violation.  There he received a favorable ruling due to following some counsel Austin gave him months ago.  Rather than waiting until his release to assess this legal matter, Austin recommended Justin write the parole board to notify them of his incarceration.  At the hearing it was determined that his time served from that postmark forward would count.  He will only have to complete one additional week when he finishes his current sentence.  Justin gave God the glory for this determination.

I asked Justin who might be willing to attempt to restart the study group.  He said Matthew (one of the guys who had recently sent me his first ever 3-column study) was the only one he anticipated was a viable candidate.  The others in the pod who had participated when Austin led the group had stopped attending.  It appears likely that Justin’s personality did not work well as the facilitator of the group.  He had followed through on his commitment to me by teaching Matthew.  Maintaining contact with this pod would hinge on Matthew’s willingness to be the person of peace.

I wrote Matthew identifying myself and giving a sketch of my work with Justin and Austin.  Also, I included the article on doing a Discovery Bible Study written by Paul Watson.  I invited this inmate to become the point person for a group in the pod.  He would have to request that I be listed as his pastor before I could schedule a visit.

A few days later I received email confirmation from the chaplain acknowledging the request had been approved.  I scheduled a visit for Friday, November 30, 2007.  That very morning I received a letter from him accepting my invitation.

Matthew wrote, “Yes sir I received your letter today.  I will love to be the one to keep the Bible study going.  I have to be honest I don’t know a hole lot about the Bible so it will be a learning experience for me to.  It’s weird because for the past week or so I have been wondering what God wanted me to do with my life and how I can repay him for the blessing that he has gave me then all the sudden I get your letter.  So to me I feel this is another blessing and God’s way of answering me….To be honest I am going to need a lot of help with this because like I said I don’t know to much about the Bible but I want to chang my lifestyle and I ask that you would help me with that because I think it’s time for me to start doing for God instead of always wanting him to do for me.”

The work continues.

[ * Note:  The names of these men have all been changed.  All the other details are accurate.]

by johnkking

When Did We See You in Prison? (part 3)

Spiritual warfare began.  It especially dated to Austin and myself beginning to pray for an opening to teach Hispanic guys in the pod.  Soon after these prayers began, INS picked two of the Hispanic guys up.  Another was transferred to the state penitentiary.  The only Hispanics left in this pod spoke little English.

A couple of weeks later a couple of trouble-makers instigated a sit-in breakfast strike that resulted in half of the guys being removed from the pod and taken to the Maximum security pod.  The number of guys in the group study dropped from eight to three.  Austin was disappointed in what had started so well being so quickly depleted.  He began to pray and decided to hand-write an invitation to the group studies and slide it under each cell door (he could do this since he had more freedoms as a trustee).  Several new guys began attending the group.

I had never seen Austin without a smile.  His disappointment was apparent when I arrived for my next visit.  I anticipated something had gone wrong because Austin was no longer on the fifth floor.  I had to visit him on the fourth floor.  He told me what had transpired since my visit the previous week.

Another attack came from some members of the Crypts gang in the pod.  The leader resented the influence Austin was gaining.  He showed his displeasure after Austin reached out to him with the gospel.  The guy directed the other Crypts to begin charging Austin with violating rules.  His desire was to cause Austin to lose his trustee position.  When the charges proved untrue, the administration did not strip Austin of his job, but they realized there would be additional trouble in this pod if Austin remained.  They chose to move him to another pod on the fourth floor and make Austin the assistant trustee there.

My visits for the next couple of weeks were spent encouraging him and focusing on getting a new group started in the new pod.  We also discussed who would be a good candidate to reach out to in that fifth floor pod.  Austin suggested I write Justin * to see if he would step into the leadership position.

Justin was interested in meeting with me.  The group had continued to meet each evening to pray for one another and any other requests that other guys in the pod shared.  They had not continued the study since all the materials had been taken when Austin was moved.  I sent Justin a set of the God and Man studies so he could resume where Austin had left off.

It was interesting to start working with one of the guys Austin had been discipling.  He had mentioned Justin to me on a couple of occasions.  This guy had always asked deeper questions.  His inquiries often resulted in Austin writing them down and bringing them to me on my next visit.  Austin believed Justin had a desire to understand the Word.  He was right.  I started with him the same way I did with Austin—I would continue to teach as long as Justin would make an effort to teach what he was learning to someone else.  He agreed.

Meanwhile, Austin was excited and anxious to have me meeting with Justin.  He wanted me to assess whether or not he had done a good job.  Justin often wanted more depth than Austin could provide, so he had been a challenge in some ways.  Austin wanted this feedback so he could incorporate any needed changes in the new group he was launching.  He had some fears that he had done some things “wrong,” but he wanted to know so he could do a better job this second time around.

Austin’s second start has gone much better.  He earned the respect of the guys in this new pod by his lifestyle.  His infectious smile and his joy in the Lord were apparent.  Also, during the first couple of weeks, when he was still in shock over the move, he cleaned up the pod (part of his job assignments).  This pod was grungy.  They did not have adequate tools or cleaning supplies.  Austin knew what was available on the fifth floor so he respectfully requested the same items for this pod.  Instead of using a worn-out scrap of a mop, he requested and received two new mops.  He requested and received bleach that he used to scrub away the mould and mildew that had developed.  As he cleaned the place he learned that there had been quite a bit of sickness on this floor and people felt that what he was doing was going to make it a healthier place for them to live.

This group study quickly has grown to a high of sixteen.  They are alternating their study between the Old Testament and Matthew’s gospel.  They continue to study some of the God and Man stories as a foundation for their understanding of God and as a way to prepare themselves to teach others these important insights into God’s character.  During their studies from Matthew they are watching Jesus develop spiritual leadership in the men he called to be his disciples.

Because of this move, Austin has become more aware of how important it is to not only get the group to learn the biblical material, but also to be discipled in the process.  He is becoming more intentional in looking for leadership potential in the group and pouring more into the guys who exhibit potential.  Justin is also understanding at a deeper level because of what happened.  Also, he is gaining greater insight into why Austin did things the way he did.

[* NOTE: Names have been changed. All other details are accurate.]

by johnkking

When Did We See You in Prison? (part 2)

I had encouraged Jason to teach what he was learning to other guys in the pod.  This was a principle that I had been learning from listening to the CPM training CDs that recorded David Watson’s seminar in Freetown, Sierra Leone.  You learn quicker and more deeply when you teach others the new material you are learning.  Jason had been teaching others in the daily Bible study group, but he was especially discipling Malcolm.

I continued meeting with Jason, but added a weekly visit with Malcolm, too.  It was encouraging to begin to see how much Jason had passed on.  Discipling someone to disciple another really works even though it may seem counter-intuitive.  Involve your disciples in the process of discipling someone else from day one.  Do not wait until they get some body of knowledge down, start them immediately.  Make this a condition for you continuing to disciple them.  They learn more and deeper because their information is coupled with experiences.

Malcolm was farther along than I could have imagined.  I began encouraging him to disciple other guys in the pod.  I wanted him to prepare for the eventual day when he would be released.  He would have to pass on what he was learning to keep the fire burning in that pod.  As time drew near for his release Malcolm told me that there were two young guys he wanted me to meet with.

I began meeting with Paul * and Jimmy * after Malcolm was released.  Here I saw some evidence of generational degradation of information (a copy of a copy of a copy…shows real losses).  David Watson had talked about this in the training CDs emphasizing the need for training centers that bring each generation up to the original level.  There were some pieces of the discipling process that were not repeated in subsequent generations that resulted in significant weaknesses.  This was an important realization for me to experience.

Jimmy did not disciple anyone.  Paul wrestled with being shy and not easily finding someone else to teach what he had been learning.  I began to wonder if I had failed to keep the process alive and question whether I had invested too much time in people who were not teaching what they were learning.  As Paul’s release approached I asked him to pray about someone else in the pod who would like for me to visit each week.  Paul informed me the next week that the trustee, Austin *, would like a visit.

Having learned from my failures, as well as successes, I decided to start out differently with Austin.  From the first day I communicated my expectation that Austin would have to teach what I taught him if my visits were to continue.  He agreed.  Quickly he began to tell me of his efforts to teach Tommy.  Eventually I learned that Tommy brought his cousin into the study group that was forming.  Austin was taking seriously the expectation and the pace was picking up.

While spending some time with David Watson he asked how Austin’s 3-column studies were going.  I said I did not know.  David suggested I provide money for Austin to be able to photocopy his studies and send them to me through the mail.  I noted that the inmates do not have access to a copy machine.  I decided to have Austin hand write a copy and mail it to me.

Soon Austin sent me a stack of 3-column studies that had been completed by several others in his pod who were now participating in the group.  Each exhibited insights into the text and showed evidence of grasping the need to apply the passage.  Several needed to work on stating the third column in the “I will…” format that forces personal application.  These were mailed back to Austin to redistribute to the participants.  (Regretfully, these were never returned to Austin.  I do not know if they were lost in the mail or misplaced at the jail. Months later they were finally returned to me, because inmates are not allowed to receive mail from one another, they refused to deliver them all to Austin.)

[* NOTE: Names have been changed, but all other details are accurate.]

by johnkking

When Did We See You in Prison? (part 1)

One of the counter-intuitives of Church Planting Movements states:  “Expect the hardest places to yield the greatest results.”  In my attempts to obey Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 25 I am experiencing the truths of this irony.

They had not attended the church long when Jason * confessed he would be going to jail soon to pay for his crimes.  He had been using drugs and alcohol and violated driving under the influence laws.  While on probation he again became intoxicated and was caught shoplifting.  The judge was angry and Jason realized things were in a mess.  He wanted a spiritual family to accept him, his wife and children without condemnation for his sin.

We spent several weeks getting to know this family and learned to love his humble spirit.  This man acknowledged he had violated the law.  He was disappointed that his previous church chose to ostracize him and his family.  He wanted to come clean.

Our worship minister became friends with Jason and began to visit him in jail after he had to report.  Eventually he approached me to relay Jason’s request for additional biblical resources.  Within a few months, Jason had completed every Bible correspondence course the jail chaplain had on hand.  The worship minister felt like he would benefit from visits by someone with a formal theological education.  I agreed to visit Jason.

Before that first visit could be scheduled I had to complete a visitation form and agree to a background security check.  When that was cleared I began to visit weekly.  I quickly sent Jason an additional correspondence course on the Gospel of John.  Jason, his cell mate and some other guys in their pod who were meeting daily for a group Bible study quickly completed this ten lesson course.

Jason requested assistance in getting ACT study manuals for some of the other inmates who wanted to prepare to get into college upon their release.  The Rutherford County Jail is not your stereotypical place of incarceration.  The inmates are not allowed any TVs, no radios, CD players or any other type of electronic devise.  There are no hard-backed books allowed.  Family or friends could provide paperbacks, but they would become the property of the jail library.  The church where I pastor began to assist with some educational materials.

Jason requested I find a college or university that would offer correspondence courses that he could take—especially Biblical ones.  With today’s technological advances these types of programs have transitioned to video or web-based formats.  Such prevented this type of study.

Eventually I discovered the Perspectives on the World Christian Movement reader and workbook and purchased a set and had them mailed to Jason.  He was grateful to receive such an in-depth study that would give him greater insights into God’s work in our world.  After a few weeks he asked if I could get another set for his cellmate.  The two of them had been sharing one reader and workbook since the original set had arrived.  I purchased one for Malcolm * and it was mailed to him directly.  Less than two weeks later Jason was moved down two floors so thankfully each had his own study materials.  Before moving Jason communicated that Malcolm would like to visit with me each week to continue learning.

[* NOTE: The names of these men have all been changed.  All the other details are accurate.]

by johnkking

Captured Ministry

I thought my work among the incarcerated ended. Maybe it is transitioning rather than coming to a close. God seems to be bringing people across my path who have connections to my experiences.

About a month ago I received a call from a man who has been interviewed to be the executive director of a prison ministry. He heard of the model I used and wanted more information. Then I did a four-week training in facilitating DBSs and discovered that some of the participants had done time in the local work house. Recently I heard from a friend. His son has been incarcerated. Because he is concerned for his son, he asked me to pray that this young man will experience a spiritual awakening while in jail.

I offered to write his son, if the dad would provide me his address. Below is the basic information I included in my letter. Maybe this will be helpful to someone else.

Over a five year period I was able to help about 20 convicts by training them to do a simple Bible study method. It is called a 3-Column Study (Click here: 3-column-study-format). You can actually do the same thing with a blank sheet of paper. Turn it wide side up. Draw two vertical lines.

In the first column copy a section of verses straight out of the Bible—word for word. While some people find this boring, it slows you down and focuses your mind on what the passage says. In the second column re-tell that passage in your own words. Until you can paraphrase it you do not really understand it. This also helps prepare you to share what the passage means with someone else.

In the third column use the word S.P.E.C.K. to start thinking about how you should apply this passage to your life. The letter S. stands for Sin. Does this passage identify a sin that you struggle with in your life? If so, write out that sin. Does this passage contain praises to God, a prayer to God or one of God’s promises? If so, list all found in it. That is for the letter P. The letter E. stands for example. If this passage gives an example of how someone should live, then write that down. The letter C. prompts you to look for any commands that are in this passage. Write them. Finally, the letter K. causes you to note any knowledge about God’s character that is revealed in the passage.

After you have done the S.P.E.C.K. exercise you are ready to write out two or three “I will…” Statements. These communicate ways you will obey this passage. How will your life change when you put it into practice? What you write in this column should be a specific action(s) you will do to live the teaching of this passage you have written, re-told and will have to do with one of the S.P.E.C.K. items.

Doing this type of Bible study has benefited several men who were in jail. They found it very helpful. It helped one guy who had pretty much fried his brain on wild mushrooms. God’s Word re-wired his mind, but more importantly, his spirit was renewed.

I encourage you to give this a try. If you want to correspond, I will be honored to write back. But I have one condition—any letter you send me must be accompanied by a copy of a 3-Column Study. You keep the original, but send me a copy. Yes, I know it will be boring to copy it, but even that will be a valuable process.

If you do not have a Bible, request one from the chaplain. They will provide you one. I suggest you start with either the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew chapters 5-7) or the book of Ephesians. Do five or six verses at a time. Doing one of these a day will be an exercise that God will use to bless you.

Here are links to other articles I have written about some of what happened while I was working in the local jail:
https://johnkking.wordpress.com/2010/07/23/dbs-in-jail/
https://johnkking.wordpress.com/2011/03/25/nothing-grows-in-the-desert-except/
https://johnkking.wordpress.com/2010/11/02/why-not-here/

Maybe there is more God will do in this area. I am looking forward to talking in person with the man about the prison ministry. I hope the young man chooses to open himself to God’s Word. Maybe some of those who learned how to train others to facilitate Discovery Bible Studies will be able to pass it on to folks in the work house. Join me in praying that Jesus’ work of “setting the captive free” will come to pass!

by johnkking

It’s a Wrap!

Our investigation of the counter-intuitives of Disciple Making Movements (DMMs) was completed with last Thursday’s post. These are general observations we have noted from the movements we have tracked for the last six years in sub-Saharan Africa. They are not mathematical equations. Wisdom must be utilized when one seeks to evaluate new regions and new people groups in their light.

This is one of the challenges of DMMs—one size does not fit all. While every tailor knows how to measure, cut and sew material, every new suit will be different because of the differences of the size and tastes of the client. While every baker measures, mixes and bakes cakes, no two wedding cakes are likely to be identical because of the differences in the wedding parties.

Learning from diverse DMMs gives us insights into how things might be done, but the tactical choices will be impacted by many factors. The analogy I have used to get some people to think about this comes from the NFL. Professional coaches often script their first twenty offensive plays. These choices are arranged in hopes of capitalizing on the defensive tendencies that have been discovered through hours and hours of film study. Coaches hope to be able to score on that first drive to grab momentum and apply pressure to their opponent. But they are also hoping to discover what adjustments will be made to overcome said tendencies.

Consider these counter-intuitives as evidence of tendencies. But recognize that our enemy is always making adjustments. One size will not fit all. “Trial and error” learning is often demanded. Standing on Jesus’ promise that the gates of hell will not prevail (gates are always defensive structures), probe the defenses of Satan by scripted attacks. Recognize that you cannot script the whole game before it begins. Faith demands trusting the Holy Spirit to bless the things you do and to give you needed information in making needed adjustments as you move forward. But recognize that you will not learn these new insights sitting on your good intentions.

Recently I spoke by phone with a brother who is being considered as the executive director of a prison ministry. As he described the organization’s vision I was impressed. They are already targeting the inmates who refuse to attend traditional ministry outreach efforts. They utilize sports to gain the attention of these inmates. But this brother has heard about the DBSs. He has been exposed to 3-Column Studies. He is four generations removed from me and we have never met. Recently the second generation brother met him and they started talking about his possible new position. Because I cut my teeth in prison/jail ministry it appeared maybe we should chat.

Not everyone will be called by God to minister to inmates. To make prison ministry a necessary piece of DMM training would be unwise. It is one of those “hardest places” that sometimes yield the greatest results, so I am excited to be able to share my experiences in a few weeks. Long-term, I may end up training this brother, his organization, these prison missionaries and/or some of the Persons of Peace they have already discovered (but would not yet call them that).

Re-read these articles periodically. Pray that Papa God will bring people, situations and needs to mind from your context as you read them. Ask him to unlock the creativity and wisdom he has already placed in you. Ask him to give you insights on reaching the unreached.

Send me an email. Ask me to help you think through your situation. I will probably ask you to write out a description of the people group you are called to reach. This will help me to capitalize on your insights. It will assure me that you are already doing what you know to do. Ultimately, I cannot make decisions for you—only you should do that. But I will be honored to help you process. If I am at a loss I will reach out to the more experienced strategists that I know and trust God to give some great suggestions. Use these as resources. Blessings!

by johnkking

Overcoming Spiritual Attention Deficit Disorder

No, that disorder does not appear in the official DSM3 (my apologies to my counselor friends). But is an observable condition if you hang around church people too much.

We talk about not having time to be in the Word, but sure are able to quote the words of songs and movies (have you ever noticed how many lyrics are used as Facebook statuses?). Oh, well, that’s another rant for another day.

Every other Friday I lead a Bible study at the local jail. This morning their were seven guys who participated. Six of them were there two weeks ago and the other guy was incarcerated since then. While we were waiting to see if anyone else would join us, one of the guys told me some good news.

He said, “You know that study method you taught us? I’ve been using it and it really helped. I really have trouble reading the Bible and staying on track. It helped me. Thanks.”

To be honest, I had been pondering whether or not it was time for me to discontinue my role in this ministry. Another guy does a study for this same pod on the alternating weeks and he would be pleased to teach the same group every week. “Would that continuity be better for them than what I am doing?” is a question I have been asking myself.

How do you know when your efforts are worthwhile? How do you know when you are being called to make changes?

It encouraged me to hear this unsolicited assessment. I also thought about three friends who work in foreign mission points who have been encouraged to start Discovery Bible Studies in their local jails/prisons because of the testimonies I have given regarding how God has worked here through me.

I always share with these guys how to do a 3-column study. They have much time on their hands. They have a Bible, paper and pen. They can do these studies. God will bless them as they handle his Word. He has promised that when it goes out it will not come back without having an effect. I believe his promises and have seen fruit in numerous lives–as long as they keep hearing God and putting what they hear into practice.

Many of my older posts touch on this same theme, so I won’t bore you with a rehash. But you might want to check out:

https://johnkking.wordpress.com/2010/10/14/overcoming-apathy-in-your-walk/

https://johnkking.wordpress.com/2010/07/23/dbs-in-jail/

https://johnkking.wordpress.com/2010/07/09/dbs-and-3-column-studies/

One way to assess your work is to determine whether or not it is reproducible. God’s creation celebrates reproduction. Jesus used horticultural metaphors to reveal that God is into the multiplication business. He works in us an through us to produce fruitful practices. But we often get in the way–especially by complicating things.

Now sometimes we are doing the right things, but in the wrong places. If nothing is reproducing then you are either in the wrong place or using the wrong strategies.

I am still assessing this place. How about you? Are you bearing fruit? Are you bearing much fruit? Keep me in your prayers and I pray you will experience the joy of God’s desire to produce an abundant harvest (John 15:8).

by johnkking

Ephesians Applied to My Life (cont.)

Ephesians 5:21-6:9

(21) Since Jesus submits to the Father, we will recognize proper lines of submission.

(22-33) A wife’s husband is accountable. Just as Jesus answers for the church, he will answer for his wife. As the church submits to Jesus, so the wife submits. Husband, imitate Jesus with a servant love for your wife. His love made the church godlier. Jesus made the church more beautiful and purer. Model Jesus.  Love her like your own body—you are one in marriage. Every sane person takes care of his body rather than abusing it.  We get to imitate Jesus in this. We are parts of his body. This oneness has always been God’s plan for marriage. A great marriage gives deep insight into Jesus’ love for the church. Husband, love her like yourself; wife honor him.

Ephesians 6

(1-4) God rewards children for obeying their parents. He attached the first promise of a blessing to honoring them. Good things and life expectancy are tied to obeying your parents. Dads must nurture faith rather than bullying their children.

(5-9) Superiors should be treated in the same way you submit to Jesus. Not only when they are watching you because you are mindful of God’s will for you. Give them the kind of service you would give God. You know God sees and rewards every good deed.  Your status doesn’t matter in this. Supervisors, treat your people with respect.  Don’t bully them since you know God is over both of you and he doesn’t play favorites.

“I Will…” Statements

  • I will build respectful relationships.
  • I will be the kind of husband to whom  Debra finds it easy to submit.
  • I will have a saving influence in my leadership role.
  • I will lead like Jesus so Debra knows she’s blessed in my leadership.
  • I will be like Jesus—loving Debra with a sacrificial love.
  • I will love so that it makes her a better person.
  • I will lead her into increasing holiness.
  • I will love Debra with the protective love I have for myself.
  • I will care for her as I care for myself—better yet, love her as Christ loved the church.
  • I will reflect Jesus’ cares for me.
  • I will remember that oneness is God’s goal for marriage.
  • I will show Jesus’ love for the church in my marriage.
  • I will love Debra like myself so she can readily respect me.
  • I will obey my parents with a godly respect.
  • I will remember God’s promised blessing.
  • I will recognize God blesses my respect for my parents.
  • I will create a healthy environment that nurtures faith in Kenneth and Rachel rather than frustrates them.
  • I will have a respectful relationship with my accountability people.
  • Iwill be a man of integrity doing what’s right even when they are not looking.
  • I will give them the service I would give God as my boss.
  • I will recognize God will reward any good I do.
  • I will treat those who answer me with dignity and respect.  I will not strong-arm them because God will settle the score.